Category Archives: family

the weekend ….

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The weekend was a good and varied one.
Tom started work at Bluewater.
Beth went shopping with Sarah to buy things that newly 16 year old girls buy. I sit somewhat stunned to think Beth is now 16. We left Nailsea a few months before she was born … and that only seems like a little while ago.
A lot of work was done on the allotment. I managed around 15 hours from Friday night to Sunday afternoon and so a lot was done. One of my new allotment friends, a great guy called Dave, also did a massive amount on my plot while I was at the cathedral on Sunday morning and it is really starting to look like an allotment plot rather than a jungle with a few vegetables growing here and there. dave has achieved in 1 day what it would have taken me weeks to do – the generosity of people is an amazing thing!

The main highlight of the weekend was, however, celebrating a good friends birthday on Saturday night in Maidstone with a good group of friends. We went to MuMu in Maidstone which was simply an amazing experience and a beautifully wonderful place to spend an evening. The experience was amazing, as was the food and the service and the staff were fantastic. If you need a great place for a celebration then go to MuMu!! I hope we can return in the not too distant future.

But for now …. it’s Monday … tell me why ….

23 years ago …

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this was us!

How time races by!
It doesn’t feel like 23 years … well not for me anyway!
Last night we had the shocking realisation that we have been ‘together’ since we were 18 … nearly 30 years!
I’ve known Sarah for far more of my life than I haven’t known her
We look so young … and ‘yeah … I had hair!’

Not a lot to say really apart from ‘Thanks Sarah for being you’

Happy Birthday!

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18 years ago today our lives changed forever.
Tom was born.

I don’t think we could ever imagine what an amazing 18 years that would be. Sure … there have been frustrations, arguments, exasperations … but the 18 years has been made mainly a great time of joy, laughter, fun, and immeasurable proud moments.

My son is 18 today … and I want to publicly shout from blog/social networking (which was not even around when Tom was born!) how amazingly proud we are of you. It’s been an amazing 18 years and I hope and pray that there are many more to come.

Tom – you surprise me every day with your creativity, passion for justice and desire to be a help to others … you have a cool grasp of Christianity and I pray you don’t lose that … but most of all …… you are just a great guy and I’m well proud to be your dad …. and your mum is well proud to eb your mum!

Happy Birthday … and have an amazing day!

Lapland – living in the eternal now

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Yesterday we had the beautiful experience of visiting Lapland with some amazing friends. It was an early start (waking at 315am!) and a round day trip of around 3000 miles but it was worth it.

The scenery was stunning (as you can see in photos here) and it was cold … but not as cold as it could have been. But, most of all – I believe again … I stood in Santa’s cottage, had a chat and shook his hand – he is real and it is all true!

I noticed in our short stop that the way fo life was very calm and relaxed. Those same two words sum up the climate I experienced – cool, calm and relaxed. I noticed something similar in Antigua, although there is was hot, calm and relaxed.

Both lifestyles have a stark contrast to what I experience in 21st century Medway, and the UK generally, where we seem to rush around in a society that seems to place value on personal ‘busy-ness’ rather than valuing people for simple who they are and enjoying and making the most of ‘the moment’.

In our UK society I fear that we miss so much of the present around us in our speed of wanting to achieve and do better and earn more and achieve more …. it is as if we don’t ever fully appreciate anything because we are constantly looking over our shoulders to see what others have or what others are doing.

During Advent we are challenged to slow down and consider the moment of Christ entering this world and asking ourselves what that actually means for us at this very point in time. One thing I have become increasingly aware of this Advent time, is that we can only really exist in the eternal now … the past we cannot change, and the future we cannot predict … now is all we have.

In Lapland yesterday I saw the reality of people living in the now …. I pray this Christmas time that I may be able to grasp that reality of living in the eternal now.

sunday reflections

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Sarah was away at the weekend in Florence with friends celebrating Jo’s birthday. Sounds like they had a great time.

I did as well! Being home alone with the children (for just a weekend!!) it’s quite a cool experience as my children are so amazing.  I don’t know whether it is true for most children, but in the main, ours will tend to run things past Sarah rather than me. With Sarah away stuff came to me and it was a joy being involved in their lives in a slightly different way.

We also took the excuse to catch up with friends either over takeaways or at Nandos … and that was great too. I think this was massively helped by myself not being on the rota for Sunday …

Not being on the rota gave an indication of what life is like for others who do not have a church connection that requires some form of attendance on a Sunday morning. The word that summed up the experience was ‘relaxed’. With no rush to get out the door there were no arguments among people and the day was relatively stress free and happy.

With time being so precious today for families, and for most Sunday being the day when families can get together (I know this is not the case for everyone as people work Sundays too … I know!!) I have been thinking for a while that maybe ‘church’ needs to view Sunday differently.

With the gathering I am wondering whether our Sunday’s together should be more social, with less emphasis and worry on doing something that is worshipful and teaches us … so that the Sunday can be a ‘sabbath’ experience where rest, fun, socialising and eating together can be really embraced. I guess to do that though, we would need to take on a commitment to worship at another time during the week, and that could well be costly and difficult itself … or would it?

Would church on a Wednesday tea time, or a Monday evening really be any more of a challenge than church on a Sunday morning or afternoon? Do we need to think wider than we are …?

Any comments ….

step OFF the path

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10 days – that’s a pretty long time for me not to blog!

Lots has happened. We’ve been adjusting to a having a dog in the home. I’ve lost 7 kg in 10 days just from dog walking – thats a faster rate than in the gym last year (and it’s a lot cheaper!). I’ve also met with the Suffragen bishop to start to talk about my future: that did not go s well as I had hoped, but I am not yet worried or despondent! I also met with the person responsible for my ongoing training and we have some stuff that looks good ahead of me.

I have done a lot of walking recently with Skye. A great advantage of walking is the time and space that it gives to reflect. For example, I have started to see the beauty of creation once again in my own back yard as it were. I have started to see that (even) Medway can and does look good!

One reflection I have been mulling over as I walk is the routes that we take. When walking Skye I generally stick to the path that leads from A to B. Skye does not. She criss crosses the path, led by the interest generated in her nose. Whichever scent she picks up she follows. Skye and myself start at point A together and arrive at point B together. We both spend the same amount of time moving from point A to point B. I stick to the path, but Skye just goes everywhere. A conservative estimate is that Skye probably covers, at speed, about ten times the amount of space that I cover.

That got me thinking. I’ve lived near the Darland Banks for around 14 years. I have walked them many times with the family, always sticking to the path. Skye has been with us 10 days but has already covered more of the area than I have in the last 14 years.

Skye does not know that protocol means you stick to the path, which means she has discovered stuff that others have not and that she has explored things that mere humans like me did not even know were there. In 10 days she has acquired a better understanding of the lay of the land than I have in 14 years!

In faith, in theology, in life … it does seem that there are rules that we are supposed to follow. We are told that there are paths that we should sick to, depending on what particular flavour of Christianity we come from. But, I have noticed in the last few days while observing Skye that if we stick to the paths things can remain undiscovered. If we stick to the path we are in danger of staying oblivious to stuff that is ‘out there’, stuff that is useful, edifying and created by God for our pleasure, enjoyment and education and, yes, even to challenge us. If we stick to the path we run the risk of missing out on 90% of whatever it is that is around us.

I guess some people stick to the path through fear of injury or getting lost whereas others stick to the path because that is what they have always done, and it has become a habit. Others stick to the path, because using common sense, it is usually the quickest way to get from A to B. Whatever the reason, if we stick to the path, we will not receive all that is out there to receive.

So as people, as Christians, as people of faith …. maybe we need to stray off the path and discover more of what God has put out there. I mean …. really …. imagine the exciting discoveries ahead of you …

meet skye

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So … our life has changed!

Today I drove to Reading to collect Skye, an 8 month old border collie, who needed a new home.

I met a lovely family who were needing to give Skye up for perfectly good reasons and I did feel quite emotional for them as I drove away with their lovely dog.

Skye has been an immediate hit with everybody in the house but I think she is still in a major sulk with me as I am seen as the person that took her away from her lovely home. I’m sure she’ll see me as a friend soon.

This evening we went for a walk with Skye and were amazed to see how beautiful the Medway skyline can look during sunset. Going for a walk at that time of day is not something we would naturally do. but now it is going to become a bit of a habit. I’m quite excited to see what things I will notice as the seasons pass. It was also a joy to walk with Skye, who is amazingly good on the lead … lots of adventures ahead I think!

Watch this space …. (but regular readers don’t worry …. SHP is not about to become all doggy diary and stuff!)

the ‘flavour’ of Antigua

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Well … it’s been a few weeks since writing here. Most of you will know this is because of some wonderfully generous friends enabling us to have an amazing holiday in Antigua. This may be my only reflection on my time there, but it may be the first of a few or of many …. I am just not too sure yet!

In a very short space of time I fell in love with the island of Antigua. The island has an incredibly relaxed atmosphere which is difficult for me to explain.  Something can be expressed in the words of reggae and heat. Life has a slow rhythmic style due, I guess, to the heat.

I love to people watch and there were a number of things I noticed when watching the people of Antigua. People there seemed to walk proudly and calmly; due to the climate it was mad to rush about and so everything was done at a pace that seemed verrrry slow and took a little time of adjusting to. Some people adjusted to this fairly quickly and others seemed to have  difficulty with the slower pace.

I also noticed that people were interested in other people and they would chat for ages, no matter what they were doing, and they smiled easily and regularly. (in fact one of the the first things that hit me when we landed at gatwick was that people rushed and lacked a smile). Antiguan people particularly gave loads of time to children and young people, which hit me as a stark contrats to how children and young people are often portrayed in our media. Children were valued and encouraged.

The holiday was amazing and will be our ‘holiday of a lifetime’. The island is a very special place and the ‘flavour’ of Antigua, which I loved so much, has challenged me in how I should live now I am back home.
It has re-challenged my priorities of tasks vs people.
It has re-challenged my speed and aim of life.
It has challenged me to really consider what is important in life.

Now that I am back I am not embarrassed to admit that I am envious of the Antiguan lifestyle and, in many ways,  I wish I could still be there . The people there have managed to maintain something about life, people, relationships and priorities that we seem to have lost in the UK; and I think the most worrying thing is that most of us don’t even realise that we have lost them and are aware that there is an alternative. Although, I openly admit, I am not sure what that alternative is other than slow down, re-think …but our deadlines refuse us that grace!

Sadly I know the feelings and lessons from my time here will fade fairly rapidly as I adjust back to south east England living …. but I pray it does not all go and that I can carry within me some of the islands beauty that simply says ‘I have time ……..’

Krispy birthday

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Great weekend – the highlight being spending Saturday with good friends to celebrate terry’s 50th birthday …. in Krispy Kreme … different we know – which is why we did it!

I know they are a big company and everything and its ‘in’ now to knock big companies – but the staff, especially Jess, made this an incredibly lovely experience. WE laughed, made doughnuts, drank great coffee,  ate doughnuts and laughed more!

If you want a party with a difference which is well run – try out Krispy Kreme! Also, if you are part of a charity check out their fundraising offer where you can buy doughnuts from them cheap to sell at events and make money.

back to reality

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We have said goodbye to Cornwall and now we are back.

To be honest it is hard getting into the frame of mind for work again after having such an amazingly relaxing week with really good friends.

I like to reflect on the highs and lows …. but I can’t …. the whole week was simply amazing. We chilled, we ate, we chatted, we drank, we surfed, we laughed, we watched sunsets, we saw seals, we fished (I experienced sea sickness for the very first time … maybe that was a low!), we visited the Eden Project, we wandered around Padstow and my lovely family bought me a painting from Caroline Walker who we met a few years ago. I am now the proud owner of Mother Mary! (although Anglo Catholic friends do not get too excited!!! )

There were some nice surprises and reminders of an amazing God through sunsets and this seal which was a delight to see.

Just such a wonderful week – thanks to the other people I had the delight to share the week with!