‘It is finished!’
a cry dwindling
into the pause
named Saturday,
displaced by the nativity
of a fresh whisper;
Ricocheting in the empty tomb
Discharged of its ward
announcing
He is Risen!

Happy Easter!

Today I have been trying to reflect on what this saturday myst have been like for the disciples and followers of Jesus.

Yesterday we experienced the horrific death of Jesus with the accompanying shock and fear. Some his, some loitered but, by the end, all apart from John seemed to have disappeared.

But today …. today the disciples woke and it would have sunk in.
Jesus was dead.
The Messiah was dead.
He ha really gone.
It was all over.
Their dreams had come to an end.

Would there have been a certain numbness to this day?
Would they have kept thinking ‘this time yesterday I was ….’
… wishing they could turn the clock back.
Would they have been thinking ‘If only ….’
… wishing they could have done something to make it different
And what about the ‘I wish I hadn’t done ….!’
… wishing there was some way to make it all right again.

Today God had left them.
Today God descended into hell.
That must have scared them!

Today was a nothing day
a vacuum day
a day of unbelief
a day with no God.

Holy week started today.

For the cathedral. amongst other things, it meant we marked palm Sunday by processing down the High Street singing and waving palm leaves and crosses – with a donkey too!

Holy Week is an important week for me. It is a time when I try to re-centre, re-focus and re-member what Easter is all about. In doing that I hope that I start to rediscover what it is that I am all about.

It may sound strange but sometimes it is quite easy to take faith and what I believe God has done through Jesus has for granted.  Holy Week is a time when I reflect more, think more and ask more questions about what has happened, is happening and might happen next.

This week at th cathedral there are a number of services which anyone can come to. Outside these times we are always open for people to come and sit and reflect if that is what they want to do. Today I have also found what looks to be  day by day guide to Holy Week via Nick Page’s blog. The resource is well worth a look!

I didn’t manage to get to walk the Easter Path in Brighton but Darren did and took this great pic of ‘bumper cross’.

If, like me, you never got a chance to do the walk you can visit Easter Resurrected on the evening of April 26th where all the stations will be under one roof.

No longer dead!
No longer held in the tomb!
He is Risen!
Amazing!

How did they feel
when they woke on Saturday morning
those who deserted him
those who ran at the sign of trouble
those who saw him breathe his last

was there guilt?
I wish I had stayed awake with him
I wish I had done something
anything

confusion?
but those miracles
but those things he said
but …

pain?
I miss him
I can still hear his voice
It hurts so much

anger?
why has this happened?
what have they done?
they’ll wish they hadn’t

tears?
of unbelief
of sorry
of pain

a sense of betrayal or being conned?
But he said he was the Messiah
but now?
well now he is dead!!
he can’t have been who he claimed
he can’t have been the answer
he was wrong
I was wrong

it’s all over now
the proof is there
the dead body of Jesus lies in that tomb.

“Those things which are precious are saved only by sacrifice.”

David Kenyon Webster
Easy Company
506th Parachute Infantry Regiment
101st Airborne
(featured in Band of Brothers)

I have deliberately not been blogging over this past (Holy) week. I have been using the time to reflect on the season we are in.

After the run through of the Easter services yesterday I ended up with a colleague speaking to a young homeless couple who are sleeping near the cathedral. I’m not going to share too much out of respect and dignity but I was struck by a comment when we asked if they had been to the cathedral to ask for food :’we don’t like to because we feel embarrassed by asking’

Yesterday I felt helpless and hopeless. I wanted to help but, beyond giving them a little of my time and a bag of food from the cathedral store, there was little we could do. The local authority is not helping because they don’t have ID.

I got home and was quite struck by my helplessness and felt quite hopeless. I had spent a day reading and writing and then rehearsing, while outside those that Jesus came for as well were hungry and shivering.

I was particularly moved by the vulnerability of this couple. The hopelessness of their situation. Here were the son and daughter of someone, here were children of God, here was God himself asking to be cared for. Today I still feel ‘heavy’ as I acknowledge my limitations and take on an understanding that Jesus also had to walk away from situations.

In a way I think this, in a different light, is possibly how some of the disciples felt during this week. They could see their friend arrested, beaten, moved between Pilate and Herod and wanting to help. A burning inside them that demanded they do something to make the situation better. A sickening rising within them as they realised there was nothing that they could do.

The hopelessness of Easter precedes the joy.