change!

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I love change.
Change is what I am about.
Change encompasses the thrust of my role.
For the last 20 years or so I have always had roles where change has been central to what I’m about.
So … not only do I like change, but I think I cope well with change.

Or so I thought!

It has been an interesting few months. I have found certain things a bit of a struggle but I have not been able to place my finger properly on why. It’s not been anything desperate or worrying, but I have been aware that things have not been ‘quite right’. I have been unsettled.

While having coffee with a friend the other week she asked me a significant question that resulted in an immediate answer but later resulted in a type of epiphany moment where I saw things differently.

The question was simple, ‘Do you cope well with change?’ I immediately answered yes but then this thought came into my head which said something like ‘yes, that’s true I cope with change well and have done over the years because I have been the instigator of change, I have been the person steering change. I have moved from teams and left them to cope with change. There is a lot of ‘I’ there and I think that is what my friend was causing me to think about.

There is a big change afoot with Adrian leaving to become bishop and for the first time in two decades I am experiencing a change that I have no control over. I have always been the person that has moved on to something new. I have never remained in the same place to experience change as part of a team that I do not lead.

It’s an odd feeling, I guess, and I am not sure it is a feeling or situation I can say I enjoy. But … now that I am aware of it life is back to ‘normal’; whatever ‘normal’ happend to be for any of us.

Being aware of my unsettledness has allowed me to express this through my relationship to God and I guess serves as a reminder that it is God we rely on, God we follow and God who enables us to do whatever it is that God calls us to do.

The next year or so is going to be strange, worrying, uncomfortable and quite exciting …… as I said; I love change! (but if you are the praying sort – please pray for us all as we go through this transition)

ancient …. future

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On Sunday the gathering well … err gathered as we do in the Crypt of Rochester Cathedral. The crypt, or more accurately the Ithamar Chapel, was a particularly great setting for us as we were looking at and trying out the ancient practices of Lectio Divina and The Examen. (We used our own version of the Examen which you can find here).

I think this time together for us was good in that it helps us as we ‘try to travel our journey of faith together while we listen’ as our website claims. Both of these practices, but particularly, for me, the Examen are great ways to connect with the Divine on a regular basis. Personally I use the Examen at either the start or the end of the day and often find myself excited or surprised at how I have met with God throughout normal everyday activities.

These are great ancient practices that can help us on our journey’s into the future.

what if Jesus really meant what he said?

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My thoughts have been following a theme recently; particularly since the video I posted on my last blogpost regarding Christians who seem top have lost the plot about who Jesus is, what he stands for and how Christians follow, or don’t follow, his example.

My wonderfully helpful mentor, Ian, suggested recently I read Shane Claiborne’s Irresistible Revolution. I enjoyed the book but was also made to feel incredibly uncomfortable as it is a thoroughly challenging read.

Thanks to Alice I have been been directed to this interview that Shane Claiborne gave to Esquire magazine when asked to address those who don’t believe. He reminds people of what the bible really says which sometimes gets him into a lot of trouble, such as:

‘It is so simple, but the pious forget this lesson constantly. God may indeed be evident in a priest, but God is just as likely to be at work through a prostitute … scripture is brimful of God using folks like a lying prostitute called Rahab and an adulterous king named David.’

As I said I am challenged by his words …. whether you have a faith or not, why not check out this article

As an add on comment, I guess I’m drawing attention to this because I am finding myself challenged in my role as part of the church, the Body of Christ. There is so much we can and should be doing, but we seem to make a mere scratch due to some political worry or other.

I believe the question in the title is a no brainer! Of course Jesus meant what he said … what I am asking is how do I follow and take those words seriously? I guess it’s the old question: ‘how can I live out my faith in the way Jesus would if he was here?’

Fan or Follower

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This has been going around the web …. it’s funny …. some will find it offensive …. WARNING – ‘F’ word alert at 1:13 … for me it kind of follows in some way from yesterday’s anger over children …. but today this is about the Christian view of violence …

As Christians do we take the commands of Jesus seriously, or not … are we followers or fans?

I’m angry …

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We live in a mad sick country in a mad sick world!

I was really moved by this program last night. If you are in the UK you can watch it here for the next 6 days in iPlayer. I experienced a mixture of anger and sadness when I heard this (amongst other things):

One in 5 low income families report skipping meals … that is something 8 year old Courtney experiences every week.
“For tea we have a big version of a sausage roll. I go without dinner when I’m at home but when I’m at school I get free dinners.”
Courtney lives with her mother and three sisters. Come the school holidays paying for food for the girls is a struggle without free school meals.

This morning on the BBC website it is contrasted by this story. I’m a football fan …. but this just makes me feel sicker than normal.

This mornings reading in Morning Prayer was 1 John 3 and I read these words:
‘How does God’s love abide in anyone who has the world’s goods and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses help?’

How indeed?
How have we got to a situation where no one bats an eye at a price tag of £20 million for a sports person and yet turns a blind eye to children like Courtney without food, or like Paige who sleeps in a room riddled with damp in which the ceiling collapsed, or like Sam … or like countless others in our communities ….

 I feel angry …. but I guess anger is useless …. instead I need to consider what I can do to help?

meeting Jesus

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I led the monthly Taize service in the cathedral last night. This is a calm, meditative and contemplative service with lots of pauses and silences. I enjoy this service as it allows people to simply take their time with God.

I changed the format a little last night. usually the format is that of chants interspersed by two readings and silences after the readings. Last night I chose to replace one of the readings with a guided meditation which people seemed to find quite powerful. The theme for this month was ‘meeting Jesus’.

I used a meditation that I have adapted and used before from a very old youth work book called ’40 Devotions that work with Youth’ which is a little gem I pull off the shelf now and again. A number of people asked for a copy of the ‘Meeting Jesus’ meditation and so if you are interested you can download it from here.

ascension reality?

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Today is Ascension Day.
It’s not a day I have ‘grown up’ with from my tradition.
It features more that I am now based at a cathedral.
But … its is an interesting ‘event’ and, as Maggi points out, it is an interesting account to approach.

I am not sure what this story is about.
I am not even sure how to explain it.
I’m sure it will mean different things to different people at different times.

I have led morning prayer and the eucharist today where I have been put in a position to have to think a little more about this day and what it means to me.

Today … I think it challenges me.
As Christ ascended and
‘a cloud received him out of their sight’
this story today challenges me to look
above, beyond, ahead.
It reminds me I don’t know what is coming
and in that reminder
I become more aware that things won’t be like this for ever

It encourages me
to lift my eyes up from the ground
to look towards the sky
to see afresh the beauty of creation
and to dream again of how things could be

It’s very easy to become immersed in the everyday
and to lose sight of the reality
that we are part of an amazing creation!

questions rise from the ashes

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The mbs fair in London was, as ever, an amazing experience. I was moved to tears by ‘stuff’ that people wanted to share and felt incredibly humbled, as well as inadequate, as people trusted me and shared things for prayer. The dekhomai stand welcomes and offers everything as a gift for free as we are very conscious that it is not us helping people but it is Christ working through us. As Jonny said – the energy is only strong on our stand if the risen presence of Jesus is with us … and I believe he has been.

I was able to wander around the stalls a little bit this year and was interested to see who was there and who has not come back. I also had a few interesting conversations with other stall holders which left me with questions. In particular I remember a conversation with a women running a stand that specialised in native american instruments, clothing and spirituality. I was particularly interested in a Shaman Drum that was painted with a picture of a phoenix.

I am interested in the mythical phoenix creature with it’s overtones of resurrection and new life. In our conversation I noted that the phoenix looked like t was singing – to be told I was correct and that the bird was singing a song calling the souls to come home and return to their maker. I guess that birthed a question within me …. could this be God calling his people from with an ancient tradition?

I always find this event amazing, I find it emotionally tiring, sometimes challenging but always I come away with a renewed acceptance that I know and understand so little of our creator God.

Thanks people for the opportunity again to take part – and thanks to those that allowed me to share in their lives for a little while … may God continue to bless you.

pub theology discussions

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We had another great time at pub theology last night.

The subjects were not as varied in the past possibly because we started the discussions off by asking whether it was right to have killed Osama Bin Laden.  This became a wide ranging discussion looking at a range  of our differing views on  a variety of associated topics.

It sounds strange, because there is no immediate link, but we then moved into a shorter discussion on whether the rise in vampire and werewolf movies is a sign of interest in the after life and spirituality within society or whether they are just good (or bad) films with good (or not!) story lines.

Anyway … we seemed to have a good time pulling all that stuff apart! As ever, we never came to decisions, i don’t think we agreed on much …. but then that is not what it’s all about is it!

dekhomai in London

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I am looking forward to being a part of the Dekhomai stand again this year at the Mind, Body and Spirit fair in London. The event runs from 25th – 30th May and I will be there on the Thursday. You can find us on stand 43.

This is an amazing event which is full of spiritual seekers. There is a whole variety of spirituality here that visitors can interact with. Dekhomai offers spiritual resources from a Christian tradition. In the past we have offered Jesus Deck readings, healing prayer, prayer beads, foot and hand massages along with listening. Everything we offer is free of charge.

I simply love this event. I love the way God brings people across each other paths, I love the way people come searching, I love the openness and the acceptance that there is across most of the festival.

If you have not been before and want to experience something different …. maybe see you there!