not alone

I have been reflecting on my past week. I was concerned that things would have taken a step back because of my absence over the Christmas period. I was correct in my concern. Conversations have been very limited and most of the week I have sat alone and simply waited!

This last week has been a hard and lonely week. I knew the week was always going to be ‘harder’ as it was the week of the annual YFC staff conference and not being there after doing around 12/13 in a row was odd not least because it was a highlight of the year when I used to enjoy meeting up with people that I never saw for the most of the rest of the year. I missed meeting with these people whose friendship and time I have valued over the last decade.

The week, though, has been hard because it has been a quiet and lonely week. Having no staff meeting at the start of the week left me feeling surprisingly un-rooted from the start of the week. Sitting in ‘spoons and the gym and having only one conversation all week results in you questioning what you are doing, and why you are doing it.

It is at times like this that I am grateful most of all for my prayer partners. The realisation that they are praying for the stuff I ask them to pray for on a day by day basis through my weekly email has been a real encouragement to me this week. When I have felt alone (and yes … I know I have not been because God has been with me!) it has been amazingly helpful to know that others have been praying for exactly what I have been doing.

So … don’t underestimate prayer – and thank you to each and every one of my prayer team. Of course … if you’d like to join this fantastic group of people who receive a weekly email from me and pray accordingly please get in touch!

enough?


Yesterdays ASBO cartoon points to the Christian Aid website where you can send an email to encourage action to help the innocent civilians of Gaza. I sent an email to Gordon Brown and received this response to pass on to others. If you are shocked, angered, saddened by what is happening in Gaza

I’ve taken action on the crisis in Gaza. We all need to act to stop innocent civilians being killed. Please take action too so that we can show the government how strongly we feel about this issue. Click here to email Gordon Brown encouraging him to act.

Grab a t-shirt


One of the great spin offs from being on placement with Moot, which seems likes years ago, is making friends with some great people.

Mike is one of those and artist at Moot. He has designed some great t-shirts here which are well worth the money.

I have to go to the diocesan conference at Bognor in a couple of weeks and was thinking about purchasing t-shirt illustrated to wear – but I wonder if it might wind someone up …. but maybe would not upset some more ‘narrow’ people as the t-shirt below … whatever … why not go buy one from here and make Mike a happy man!

a typical day

It’s been another ‘interesting’ mixed day in the life of a pioneer curate.

After Matins, as is now customary for me on a Tuesday and a Thursday, at 8.30am I go on a little circular prayer walk around Rochester. It takes about 30 minutes if I can remember to walk slowly (20 if I forget!) as I ask God to bless the places I walk past and bring to mind anything I need to pray for. If you are in the area why not join me?

The view from the Castle gardens this morning as I prayed was stunning. The cathedral was encircled by a skirt of fine white mist while the top half reflected the sunshine magnificently.
The building was radiant, if buildings can be
such! The crispness of the morning emphasised the strong lines of the cathedral and I felt God was saying and reminding me that ‘Before all this… I am’ It was hard not to praise God and be reminded of his glory at such a sight.

I returned to the office to find which desk is available for me today and from there had a few thoughts on paper for the Family Service I am speaking at in a few weeks time on the conversion of St Paul. WE have a baptism and so I am still in two minds on whether I should speak on the text or on baptism in a family service kind of way as I don’t think it is that easy to combine both and be both succint and engaging in the way I believe I need to be at such a service.

My normal morning coffee in ‘Spoons was fairly uneventful until the catholic couple I have been chatting with since my first visit there came in and we caught up with news from the Christmas break. The Christmas break does seem to have set things back a bit as conversations that I had been having with people have dried up. I would panic – but God reminded me this morning that he is in control!

After lunch I visited the sports centre and bumped into a guy I worked with on the streets in my YFC days some 12 years ago. He was 12 when I worked with him and is now nearly 25 and just been released from prison. I’m sad to say I did not recognise the face but knew the name and in discussion remembered the names of others in that gang and where vthey used to hang out – the exciting thing for me was he approached me and asked ‘didn’t you and your wife run a drop in in the high street?’ Is this a chance encounter or an encounter with mileage for the future? It’s a question that God will answer in time – and I wonder whether this encounter is part of why God reminded me this morning that before all this he is and so he is in control.

I then ‘tail ended’ my day with Choral Evensong in the cathedral which is becoming a space where (now) familiar words but unfamiliar music are allowing me to experience new things of God.

4 months in – and it still makes me smile that God has placed this pioneer where he has placed him, and I’m still amazed at what God is revealing to me through the unfamiliarity of it all.

Lord … have mercy


continue to pray for an end to this sadness

Training Day

I attended KCME today, which is our ongoing training ‘post ordination’. I don’t know of it is just me, but I do seem to find this extracting myself from mission to consider, in today’s case the role of the deacon, to be quite frustrating.

It is important to continue to learn, and not just because the role of ‘curate’ is a training role – but I do wish that the training takes account of what we already know and have experienced. It seems we start again at base level and ‘forget’ that we have all been on at least 3 years part time training or 2 years full time training at Bible college. Maybe SEITE was different to others, but I am frustrated because I do not think I learned anything different today from the a whole weekends training on the deaconate and priesthood in May.

It was good, however, to meet up with my colleague curates and hear stories of what God is doing in each others lives and through each others ministries and then chatting over the issues raised. It is both amazing and encouraging to hear what each of us is experiencing and how we are dealing with certain issues. It was also useful to hear other peoples input into situations and point out things that those incvolved had not noticed or realised. This, however, was squeezed into 40 minutes and I came away thinking today that we had got the timings all wrong – 40 minutes on the deaconate and 2 hours on stories from our situations may have been more useful.
(image link: http://cache1.asset-cache.net/xc/83373880.jpg?v=1&c=NewsMaker&k=2&d=47E4064542B2F7236DE78A5E76F5871C)

a small stand

Sometimes it takes a little country to make a stand for justice. If I were Venezuelian today I think I would be proud of my president who has expelled the Israeli envoy in protest at the Israeli offensive in Gaza reported here.

Mr Chavez is quoted to say:

“I call on the people of Israel to stand up against that government, to demand, to put a hand on their hearts and look at their children, and I call on the world to stop this madness.”

Who can disagree?

Lets pray that the world can stop this madness!

Epiphany Jouney’s

Today was Epiphany and this evening in the cathedral we marked this with a Eucharist service rather than evensong.

The whole Epiphany thing, where we remember the visit of the Magi and the gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh, seems to me to be all about journeying.

While reflecting today, listening to Neil’s sermon this evening, and after reading Maggi’s final reflection in Beginnings and Endings, I was struck by the journey of the magi and how that journey connected with my thoughts here on the life changing disruption a baby causes.

The encounter with the Christ child for the magi was also disruptive. They traveled, following the star but had to return home by a different route. For them, as for others, the encounter with this child meant things could never be the same again. For them, it meant returning home via different route. For them it gave opportunity of fresh discovery.

That sense of returning home by a different route resonates with me at this point in time. A couple of people have asked me how I am feeling about ‘stuff’ over the last few days and I must admit that as well as starting to become frustrated with waiting I feel very much as if I know where I am going, or I roughly know where I think I should be, but that I need to find a new route to get there. I don’t necessarily think it’s a new fresh path – I don’t think the Magi would have made a fresh track, it would probably have been walked by others but it was new to them as they had never taken the route. I wonder whether there is a path, a route, an ancient track that needs rediscovering, uncovering and walking along again.

But it is not just about the destination is it! There is something about the actual journey itself. There is something about noticing what you are passing through, the ‘lie of the land’ and the context of what you are seeing.

One of my little frustrations is that our family car came with a free DVD player. It’s great for long journey’s when you ahve 3 children and when we travel to Dorset, Devon or Cornwall it comes in very handy for a peaceful journey. But … when we travel short distances, such as 20 minutes to Bluewater or 40 minutes to Canterbury the children have started to like to watch DVD’s for this short time. They plug in via their headphones to whatever film they choose. While they do this, the outside world that they are passing through whizzes by un-noticed.

I can’t help but think they are missing out on stuff that children of previous generations would have noticed. Things go by and my children travel through areas untouched by the outside world. They know the start and end of their journey well, but the middle part is missing.

I feel there is something in this ‘journey stuff’ for me to reflect upon. I am asking and wondering what it might be that God wishes me to notice on the way. I guess to notice things properly there is a need to journey slowly and register and take note of what God puts in the path of the traveler. To pioneer is to go slow and allow God to show me how to discover stuff afresh.

So … here’s to more of that frustrating waiting then!

proud fan

We had a great day supporting the Gills and have returned proud of the team today. I think those watching at the ground and on the telly will have seen that the Gills were a match for high flying Villa and the 2-1 result shows the Gills can hold their own. Some feared the result may be an embarrassment, and I think the Villa fans expected to win by a much bigger margin, but today was great day for the players, fans and the club. The boys haven’t stopped talking about it since we got home!

Just hope we can play like this for the rest of the season … if we can promotion would be a definite!

Gaza ASBO


As I have been watching the news over the last week I have felt myself getting angrier and angrier. The disproportionate reaction of Israel to Hamas is obscene and it seems no one cares that innocent men, women and children are being slaughtered in the name of ‘war on terror’.

Any other nation at all and the UN would be complaining and the US and UK would be asking for action. It’s Israel so we sit back and allow it to happen. Violence in all forms is wrong; it is wrong that Hamas rockets have killed 4 Israelis, it is wrong that the Israeli reaction has killed 460 Palestinians and left another 2300 injured. In this case … who is the real terrorist? It is hard, however, to maintain an unbiased view with figures that illustrate such a massive loss of life. Israels reaction is surely in breach of international law.

ASBO Jesus sums up well with the cartoon