I went to Taize prayer in the cathedral crypt last night. It was excellent. There was a deep silence sat in the crypt which I loved – it was a special time for many people that were there. It seems strange, but even in a cathedral I have found that finding silence can sometimes be a challenge.
Taize was a time where we could explore this silence.
I’m glad to say this happens every month in the crypt at 8.00pm – so I’ll definitely be at the next one.
On Tuesday I traveled to see Epping Forest YFC and lead their prayer meeting and then meet up with friend Leesa for lunch.
I always like to try and be creative with local YFC teams and challenge them to think and pray in a different way to that of which they are normally used to.
Yesterday I set up a track which we call ‘the journey’ using masking tape on the floor, which is based on an idea from Mike Riddell. The basic idea is that the Christian life is a journey, we all travel through all of it, God is at the centre of all of it, and no one place is better than another.
I set up the track with the following areas:
sand and rocks to signify the desert – those parts of our journey where we feel disconnected from God, dry, lost, doubting, wanting what we can’t have
blue material to symbolise sea – to signify those times when we jump right into God and let him take us where he will, as we travel on the currents of God’s will
a lake – those places where we float and chill out with our creator
rivers – surprising places and incidents which suddenly appear and we briefly notice God breaking in
mountains – for those mountain top experiences where we live close to God; people always want to be here – but the air is thin, there is no vegetation and its not a place to be 24/7
valleys – these are dark places which quite often follow mountain top experiences. it’s tough to see where you are going when in a valley.
At the centre of all of this were three candles to represent God the Trinity at the very centre of our traveling.
Each person then took a few glass beads and shared where they thought they were at this point in time. All of us shared we were in more than one place. It was great to see that in just a group of 6 of us, we were spread all across the journey.
For me, I shared I was in an unusual place of a mix of mountain top as I’m quite excited and in many ways can see where I am going coupled with being in the sea, feeling out of my depth and needing to totally trust and rely on God.
After sharing where we were on the journey, it was a privilege to pray with each other.
The journey is a great way for praying and sharing together.
Today was a day of great tasks and plans. YFC are good to me in giving me half a day a week to study for SEITE. Today the plan was to get a large part of my placement report from Harvest written up so that I could start on the other assignment which is looking at the role of the Holy Spirit in the creation of Christian communities.
As I was making a coffee at about 8.30am I felt my back muscles start to contract across the middle of my back and within minutes I was unable lying on the floor in agony and unable to move. This has to go down as the most painful experience in my life to date – even more so than being run over in Bristol!
There is something very humbling about having to call to your 14 year old son as you can’t reach the painkillers which are centimetres out of your reach. I don’t know what would have happened if Tom had not been home today due to teacher training that’s an interesting thought!
I was forced to lay on the floor for just over an hour until the drugs started to relax the muscles and then was able to get back to my feet although only able to walk carefully around the house. Sometimes sitting is good, and sometimes moving is good, or lying or whatever!
My humanity, or the frailty of my humanity, caused my plans to change today. I have achieved a fraction of what I should have achieved and I am feeling a bit peeved over how I am going to fit stuff in now. Some people have said that this could be God calling me to slow down, others that this may be a form of spiritual attack – maybe its some or all of them, I’m unsure.
Today. though, yet again I find myself thinking how weak and useless I am without the power of God in my life. It’s easy to think I do my work and that I am good at what I do – whereas in reality I am nothing without God or the gifts he has given me to use for the Kingdom.
Today I have reflected upon that fact quite painfully and amidst the tears of pain today I was forced to cry out to God in a concrete way that I have not called out to God in a very long time. This was a cry out of my pain and panic of a need for God’s action now in substantive way rather than some theoretical hope which is where a lot of my prayer seems to have gone recently.
I am currently praying for the pain to ease and healing to occur – particularly before we set up for Living Hope after the meditation around the cross on Good Friday. Please feel free to join with that prayer!
Today I led the prayer meeting for the Waltham Forest YFC team. I always enjoy meeting up with this team and it is a privilege to join them each term to pray. Over the last year I have been conscious how the team has changed and been under pressure as well as experiencing the agony of seeing young people involved in gun and knife crime. It’s been a tough year, but in places like Waltham, every year is a tough year.
I felt strongly that I wanted to encourage this team and remind them of the hope that they have in God, and the hope that we can breathe into the lives of those that we work with ‘who do not know where to go and are like sheep without a shepherd’ (Matthew 9: 35-38).
I used an idea from Ben Edson at the OPM day recently who told the story of Pandora’s Box. After opening and shutting the box (which let out all the evils into the world) the only thing left in the box was hope. In the box that hope was symbolised by bread and wine which I brought out for us to share. We also joined in this liturgy which I wrote for the occasion:
In their reality of broken and hurting families
Lord; help us bring your hope.
In their fear of being an individual
Lord; help us bring your hope.
In their experience of violence and gang culture
Lord; help us bring your hope.
In their feelings of hopelessness
Lord; help us bring your hope.
In our conflicting pressures at home and work
Lord; give us your hope.
In our frustrations of being misunderstood
Lord; give us your hope.
In our tears over lack of care and resources
Lord; give us your hope.
In our fear of stepping out and being rejected
Lord; give us your hope.
This week
May we be agents of hope
Breathing in your hope for our lives
And breathing out your hope for the lives of others
Amen.
Today I led my last assessed service at St Mark’s. I’ve had to do 2 assessed preaches and 2 assessed service leadings each year for training. The worst thing about these is finding 4 people to complete the A4 form. I have always felt the need to be very apologetic as I ask people to complete a form for me as people are coming to church to worship and did not expect to come to fill in a form and assess me. I have managed, in the main, to use different people each time which people have appreciated.
Today I led the morning service and tried some different things such as use this Captives loop from Work of the People as I read an adapted poem which led us into a time of confession. This followed an excellent talk from Graham around the subject of ‘Looking after Number 1’
But I have been amazed at the feedback for one very simple thing that we did in the service. A young woman called Claire is going on mission to New Zealand for a few months. Rather than pray for her upfront as we would normally do, I had planned to walk with her to the centre of the congregation and ask people to stand and pray for Claire from where they were.
It seems that this simple activity was profound for so many people. People afterwards spoke of a sense of Spirit, a real sense of family and community blessing Claire, one person on the assessment form refereed to it as ‘awesome’ which I was obviously both pleased with and humbled by!
This resonates with my thoughts throughout the year around my tendency to make good use of technology whenever I can, whereas I am often surprised by how powerfully people connect with God in the simple parts of the service. I had expected people to be inspired by the video and poem, and some were; but the point at which God really broke through in a tangible way for many people this morning was when we
turned to the centre of our worship space,
looked at each other,
concentrated on one of our family,
and entrusted her to God.
God in the simple!
Maybe I just try to make things too complicated sometimes!
Today it was great to meet with the Directors of the London YFC centres. We met this morning at the Royal Festival Hall which has good views across the river. The pic shows us ending our time together in prayer for each others situations.
I always feel prayer outside of the church or a typically Christian setting is special. A few people praying naturally in a public space as others are milling around, eating, chatting seems to feel incredibly natural and part of life. In some way I feel as if we are reclaiming part of God’s creation that we have been fooled into thinking sits outside the ‘sacred’. It’s an even greater privilege to be able to pray at the centre of our capital city.
After the meet some of chatted more and laughed more over lunch – thanks people; a great day!
Pray as you go from The Jesuits has been great for staying connected ovr the season.
I may continue using this for a bit longer.
The Shiny Headed Prophet 