Monthly Archives: February 2014

chasing clouds

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cloudsIt’s been quiet here for nearly a week. This is due to a lot of my brain space being taken up with gathering rhythm of life stuff. I know people are following our journey so I thought a brief update might serve to … errrr update you, but also help me to pinpoint where my feelings are at the moment, for me to reference and return to in a few weeks time.

For the past few months we have been talking a lot about what it means to ‘belong’. Does ‘belonging’ involve, or even make a demand, of commitment to a relationship? Or … is belonging more about a commitment to travel together with no commitment to a relationship? Or … is it a bit of both? Or … is it something wildly different.

This particular aspiration is taking us a while to write. We are struggling to find something we can all agree on. We have had three major discussions and we are still talking. On one hand, I would like to register that I am finding this process so slow and frustrating. BUT … On the other hand, I am excited that we, as a community of people, are willingly spending so much time to try and get this right for our present point in time. I’m excited because this effort is being expended because we all believe each other in the community matters.

I’m excited because we are seeing that progress here makes quite big demands of us. To develop something authentic we are seeing that we need to be seriously honest with each other, exposed and vulnerable. Understandably we are finding this hard … but strangely there is something of a positive vibe in the air … like a bright summer day when the clouds seem to be bouncing off and chasing each other in a playful way.

So … if you are following our journey, and are the praying type …. please join us in praying that we can sort out what we believe it means to belong.

I have a deanery synod buzz!

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Sometimes I am surprised that the standard CofE stuff that I have to do can be pretty exciting and encouraging. Tonight I went to Deanery Synod. Deanery Synods across the nation have a bit of a reputation for being slow, tiresome and not very interesting.

Tonight was different. Tonight we were tasked with looking at a Deanery Ministry and Mission plan. Before we got onto this, though, I gave a 15 min presentation on what I have been up to as Priest Missioner for the last 18 months. As part of that I shared the Fresh Expressions sequence that distinguishes between how a fresh expression and how a traditional church plant are set up differently. The different sequence seemed to really inspire people.

church plant

I outlined how traditional church plants start with a group of people with a particular style with worship as a starting point which people are invited to; and then out of this flows community, discipleship and the mission of the group.

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I then showed how with fresh expressions, such as the gathering, that worship evolves later on. The process here, which the gathering is following, has been one of discerning and following what God seems to be calling us to do, asking what loving service looks like in our setting … and doing it! From this community grows, discipleship starts to happen and worship evolves. 

Tonight’s Deanery Synod seemed to get excited by this latter process … particularly with the ‘what does loving service look like here’ because they could see that this was a great place to start.

The conversation about the ministry and mission planned followed this presentation tonight, and I hope the gathering and my story has been able to help us think more laterally about mission in Gillingham. One idea was even to replicate the boot fair model we successfully trialled last year and spread it across the deanery. That would be very cool!

Tonight I was very inspired and people, my colleagues, said some very kind and encouraging things. This was a great meeting and the enthusiasm for mission that makes a real transformational difference to communities is an illustration of why I was ordained in this beautiful, infuriating, broad inclusive church.

Unexpectedly I have returned from Deanery Synod buzzing …. so no sleep yet then!

The mad dog walker!

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20140131-100240.jpgI have come to realise that dog walking is seriously bad for your health! Not only do you have to get up early in the morning and go out late at night in all weathers and bump into all types of people and all types of dog, not only do you risk life and limb sliding up, or down, muddy banks as the dog smells rabbit, not only do you risk contracting various diseases by picking up dog crap in very thin little plastic bags which don’t always protect your hands (!) …. but it seems also that it opens you to the risk of seemingly talking aloud to yourself and giving the impression to others that you have an imaginary friend!

I realised this last night when another dog walker gave me an incredibly odd look as it dawned on me that the conversation I was having with God (ie prayer) that I thought was in my head was, quite obviously, being said aloud! At 1130pm, when decent people are inside their warm homes either asleep or drinking good whisky, and it is quiet and calm …. one lone voice can travel quite a long way!

I mean … if you saw a giant 6’2 bloke in black raincoat and wellies with a nearly as tall greyhound charging towards you while having a conversation with a seemingly invisible friend …. what would you do! An old WWJD bracelet I saw lying around made me think that Jesus’ response if coming across such a scene with his disciples may well have been to command someone or something to come out!!!

So … now I have a reputation of talking to myself while I walk the dog …. great!

But that’s not the real danger. The real danger is that this prayer stuff, while walking, while I seemingly lose myself in both walk and nature and prayer is flipping real stuff! I don’t mean my prayers are better then anyone else’s …. but what I am noticing is that for the first time in a little while my prayers are nakedly honest. With that naked honesty comes a certain vulnerability and revealing of brokenness which means that some stuff can be dealt with. The danger with honesty is that you need to step out from hiding, and stepping into the open in that way can be a dangerous thing to do.

So is this hard? Yes
Does it hurt? Yes
Is it backbreaking, crappy hard slog stuff! Yes
Does it help! Yes

I am relearning that it’s very easy to hide. I have remembered that journeys start or take a new direction only after someone steps out, but that stepping out is the quite often the mad and dangerous thing to do. It’s a high risk thing too as when you step out others don’t necessarily join you. So, it’s pretty mad on all fronts really.

Well …. I have never made any claim that I was sane have I?
Off to step out a little more … with and without the dog!