We had a great retreat and I think it may even have been one of the best ones we have done. I’ll definitely be using the theme of trees again in the future with another group of people as the sessions seem to be very powerful for people and the metaphors of roots, trunk, branches and fruit were helpful for allowing people to rediscover where they were with God, and allow God to rediscover them.

The feelings were mixed as this will be my last retreat with YFC people. Those of you who pop in here … thanks loads for the way you co-operated over the last few days as without that the retreat could have crashed and burned in so many ways.

Out of all the sessions, for me one of the most enjoyable was the communion on the last morning put together by Phil to consider our fruits of the Spirit and shown in the photo. On either side of the bread and wine we set up nine fruits to symbolise the fruits of the spirit. The idea was that people took and ate the fruits that they specifically wanted God to develop more of in them as well as offer fruits to others along similar lines based on prayer times and conversations had during the retreat. This was a unique mix of a powerful time with a lot of humour and laughter.

Personally I was struck by two comments made by particular people on the retreat. One was ‘I know God loves me … but how does God know that I love him?’ That was an amazing question and one that I really thought on for the rest of the day. As I considered my life I came to the conclusion that there was not a lot to show that love I have, and quite a lot, actually, that could give the impression that my love was minimal.

I could argue it shows through the job and tasks that I do, but actually I get paid for them – so where are my gifts to God, those extra things I do, or say or think that show my God that I love him?

Another comment came form another great person on the retreat who was relfecting on her journey. The comment went something like ‘how did i get where I am today – the last time I looked i was 14 … now I’m 24 and directing a YFC centre!’

As soon as those words appeared I could relate 100%. As I look back, it does actually quite shock me to see where I am, where I have come from and where I seem to be being called to. I look back and I see nothing but sheer privilege there has been to srve God and others. As I looked back God seemed to be reminding me of how he had supported me in the past through seemingly impossible circumstances. Through that God seemed to be saying ‘remain faithful, I will be supporting you on this next stage even if it does seem pretty hairy!’

The retreat ws a great time away. It enabled me to regain a little bit of perspective and every conversation I had I felt privilege to be a part of.

You can see the other retreat photos on my Flickr here.

I’m off on retreat early in the morning (5.15am!) so won’t be blogging for a while. (I didn’t blog early in the morning – I’m making use of the new blogger scheduling tool which is pretty cool!)

I’m looking forward to some time to contemplate as life has been mega busy recently with family, work and study. It’s easy to lose the focus and to feel adrift in such circumstances.

I guess that pretty much sums up how I am feeling at the moment – a little adrift and just floating in a calm summer sea merrily going where the lapping waves take me and not really having a lot to do with the direction I am taking. That’s sometimes a god place to be, and I wish to be there in September – bu for now I need to be a little more disciplined so that targets are met and things are achieved.

These next few days I will pretty much be having a technology fast and making an attempt on re-centring around the stuff that matters.

During the retreat we are going to be taking the theme of trees and looking at how the tree grows, how it is shaped, how it is identified, how it bears fruit … and so on and looking at the parallels between this and our spiritual lives.

Please pray for the YFC staff there – and see you in a few days time!

I’ve spent most of today planning parts of a retreat for YFC staff in a couple of weeks in Nympsfield which has become one of my favourite ‘thin places’ in the country. The calmness of this place which is rooted in the contemplative life of the nuns that we stay with is quite unique and I’m really looking forward to returning for what I guess may well be my last visit.

I have not very far planning my bits of the retreat so I guess I need some time out to contemplate a little more what I am trying to plan. Throughout the retreat we are looking at the tree as a symbol of our lives with roots, branches etc. My main session is concentrating on the trunk and what that could be imagery for.

The trunk clearly transports the good stuff from the roots to the leaves and I’ve been doing a bit of thinking on how this might apply to me. The trunk seems to have a key role in sustaining life and I found myself wondering what sustains me spiritually. It’s easy to say prayer and daily office, maybe even Eucharist, but do they sustain me, and how can I be sure they sustain me and, more importantly is there any evidence of how they sustain me.

It strikes me as well that the trunk hides some secrets both good and made – the rings of life as the tree grows annually, but also scars of past hurts or disease are hidden behind the trunk. The trunk itself can bare scars or etchings from other people.

It looks like there is a lot going on in the trunk, much of it unseen and un-noticed. If, however, the trunk stopped doing its role and failed to transport food, nutrients and water from the roots to the leaves we would soon see something was wrong. I guess this can be like the Christian life … or maybe the hard truth is we are more able than trees to fake how we know we should be looking or sounding!?

It will be interesting to see where I go with this session, and where people go with it on retreat … just need to find an appropriate Bible passage now! Any ideas gratefully received!