Category Archives: pioneer ministry

the right question

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Quite an amazing thing happened in ‘Spoons today. I have noticed a guy who has been wary of me, not giving eye contact even when we were sat near to each other, never returning the good morning I offer. Recently we were sat in a meeting together and his facial expression gave no hint of recognition.

Today I asked him one question about the meeting, which was around something he and his wife are amazingly involved with and a conversation started which lasted for a good 30 minutes. The guy shared where he lived, his other hobbies, where he worked before he retired, what he did before then and so on.

It struck me again that people don’t know how to relate to the ‘church’ or what are seen as professional church people. As a wearer of a dog collar I am seen as ‘the church’ and I wonder whether the avoidance is uncertainty, or maybe even embarrassment, about what to say or maybe what my response will be to what they say. Some see it as a sign of holding some power or authority.

A few days ago someone suggested to another guy that he should talk to me. His immediate response was ‘I have nothing to confess’ and so closing the conversation as if to say that is the only way I know how to relate to church. Persoanlly it was quite a painful moment with a clear rejection forcefully called across the pub. I don’t believe the guy was having a go, or even that he was avoiding me but that this was more of an uncertainty of how to act or behave or what to say. Limited knowledge of what church is about results in limited options of how to relate and understand it. Sometimes I really wish I could be present without my dog collar … but if I did the anonymity of that would achieve very little to my mind.

Today’s conversation was great and interesting and hopefully will go some way to showing that I am not there to hit people with religion, but merely to be there for people, whatever that may mean.

It seems to me that we need to break down barriers and be available to people. I am wondering more and more whether this is done by finding the right connection, whether that is a similar interest or finding the right question to ask or right comment to make. That certainly seemed to be the case today. I think I am seeing more and more that is is up to me to be proactive in this by observing what is happening and taking opportunities if they come.

Another thought is that my pro-activity results in making myself publicly vulnerable and giving all the power to the other person. If I greet, ask a question or make a comment the other person has the power to answer, ignore or ridicule. I think it is right to give the power to the other person, but its only recently that I have come to understand that this is in fact what I am doing. By stepping out I become vulnerable and I wonder if in some way by doing so I give the perceived power of the dog collar away.

need … what need?

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Richard makes some interesting observations here about true and perceived need by using a great illustration of how Nike excelled in the sports shoe market.

Richard suggests, and I agree, that although we know our communities need Jesus they do not realise that fact. He suggests we ask what the perceived need of the community is and look to meet that. Nike perceived the need that people need to belong and used this to take the market and I think Richard is suggesting that we find the perceived need of our community and use this to take the market for Jesus.

I am not sure that I sit comfortably with this position. If Richard is suggesting that we befriend our community and meet these needs out of a sole motivation to see conversions to Christ then I struggle with the integrity of that. In the gospels I do not see a Jesus that serves out of a motivation for people to follow him. I see a man performing miracles that help people and give them a taste of the Kingdom of God. We see many in the gospels receiving the blessings of the Kingdom but choosing not to follow Jesus … and Jesus just continues to bless, and I guess hope!

I guess I am interested in this post because of the places I currently sit, as a pioneer minister, and ‘wait with intent’, being a presence and just waiting to see what God is doing. I hope that I am awake enough to notice and be able to join in. As I sit and observe I do ask myself and God ‘what is the need here’ and wonder how we might meet such a need. My motivation, however, is to show the love of God and allow God to do the rest, rather than look for ways to jump in with Christianity.

As this post is called The Nike Effect part 1, I realise I am jumping the gun a bit in my response as I may totally have the wrong end of the stick of the motivation behind this … and so I look forward to reading the next installment.

Ministry of Presence

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I have just finished reading Primal Vision which was originally written in 1963 by John Taylor. The blurb on the back states ‘one of the most important books ever published on the subject of African Christianity.’ Taylor reflects theologically on his experiences and conversations and radically, for his time, suggests that as guests in an other culture Christians need to listen and learn and allow that to determine our mission.

I wanted to read because I thought there would be principles to consider for today and trying to be missional in the various cultures we find in the UK today.

I was particularly excited this morning by the last chapter entitled ‘The Practice of Presence’ which I have resonated with and drawn some strength from today. Some quotes of note:

‘The core of Africa’s wisdom is that she knows the difference between existence and presence.’
To exist is to survive wheras to be present is so much more in both a sense of reality and integrity. Taylor writes of how Europeans are viewed as people who do not greet each other in the street because we are always rushing and do not have the time. He quickly follows this with an experience no doubt we have all experienced – of walking down a busy street, making eye contact briefly and exchanging a smile. The experience uplifts because we realise we are being acknowledged not for who we are or what we do or can offer, but simply because we are a fellow human being.

‘The Christian, who stands in that world in the name of Christ, has nothing to offer unless they offer to be present, really and totally present, really and totally in the present. The failure of so many ‘professional’ Christians has been that they are ‘not all there!’
This is the current core of my ministry. I am not seeking to exist as something I am not, I am, however, trying to be present in the locations I am called to be in. I find it interesting that Taylor suggests we have ‘nothing to offer unless we offer to be present’. My current experience suggests to me that all that I can possibly offer is my presence because I have nothing else to offer of any use to those that I am called to be present among.
There is, however, something quite exciting about reading words of a Christian brother written some 45 years ago do not only resonate with me but also ‘get’ what I am called to do and trying to achieve.

Those who have lost the capacity for listening, who cannot be there for others, are unable even to be truly present to themselves.’
That is an amazing gauntlet of challenge thrown down by Taylor onto the threshing floor of mission. It speaks intensely and provocatively to a Christian culture that wants to see results and tends to pedestalise (if that word does not exist, I just made it up – it means ‘to put on a pedestal) attractional mission packages such as Alpha which give ‘results’ based on a set format while it can be, or at least give the impression that it is, often unable or unwilling to have the patience through the minsitry of presence.
Taylor seems to be touching here on an idea that suggests if we do not have time to be present with others then we not only deprive those people but short change ourselves as we can not have a greater understanding of who we are unless we engage in this ministry of presence.

These are some incredibly interesting thoughts and ideas that I need to chat and think through – anyone fancy a beer to help me out?!

not alone

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I have been reflecting on my past week. I was concerned that things would have taken a step back because of my absence over the Christmas period. I was correct in my concern. Conversations have been very limited and most of the week I have sat alone and simply waited!

This last week has been a hard and lonely week. I knew the week was always going to be ‘harder’ as it was the week of the annual YFC staff conference and not being there after doing around 12/13 in a row was odd not least because it was a highlight of the year when I used to enjoy meeting up with people that I never saw for the most of the rest of the year. I missed meeting with these people whose friendship and time I have valued over the last decade.

The week, though, has been hard because it has been a quiet and lonely week. Having no staff meeting at the start of the week left me feeling surprisingly un-rooted from the start of the week. Sitting in ‘spoons and the gym and having only one conversation all week results in you questioning what you are doing, and why you are doing it.

It is at times like this that I am grateful most of all for my prayer partners. The realisation that they are praying for the stuff I ask them to pray for on a day by day basis through my weekly email has been a real encouragement to me this week. When I have felt alone (and yes … I know I have not been because God has been with me!) it has been amazingly helpful to know that others have been praying for exactly what I have been doing.

So … don’t underestimate prayer – and thank you to each and every one of my prayer team. Of course … if you’d like to join this fantastic group of people who receive a weekly email from me and pray accordingly please get in touch!

a typical day

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It’s been another ‘interesting’ mixed day in the life of a pioneer curate.

After Matins, as is now customary for me on a Tuesday and a Thursday, at 8.30am I go on a little circular prayer walk around Rochester. It takes about 30 minutes if I can remember to walk slowly (20 if I forget!) as I ask God to bless the places I walk past and bring to mind anything I need to pray for. If you are in the area why not join me?

The view from the Castle gardens this morning as I prayed was stunning. The cathedral was encircled by a skirt of fine white mist while the top half reflected the sunshine magnificently.
The building was radiant, if buildings can be
such! The crispness of the morning emphasised the strong lines of the cathedral and I felt God was saying and reminding me that ‘Before all this… I am’ It was hard not to praise God and be reminded of his glory at such a sight.

I returned to the office to find which desk is available for me today and from there had a few thoughts on paper for the Family Service I am speaking at in a few weeks time on the conversion of St Paul. WE have a baptism and so I am still in two minds on whether I should speak on the text or on baptism in a family service kind of way as I don’t think it is that easy to combine both and be both succint and engaging in the way I believe I need to be at such a service.

My normal morning coffee in ‘Spoons was fairly uneventful until the catholic couple I have been chatting with since my first visit there came in and we caught up with news from the Christmas break. The Christmas break does seem to have set things back a bit as conversations that I had been having with people have dried up. I would panic – but God reminded me this morning that he is in control!

After lunch I visited the sports centre and bumped into a guy I worked with on the streets in my YFC days some 12 years ago. He was 12 when I worked with him and is now nearly 25 and just been released from prison. I’m sad to say I did not recognise the face but knew the name and in discussion remembered the names of others in that gang and where vthey used to hang out – the exciting thing for me was he approached me and asked ‘didn’t you and your wife run a drop in in the high street?’ Is this a chance encounter or an encounter with mileage for the future? It’s a question that God will answer in time – and I wonder whether this encounter is part of why God reminded me this morning that before all this he is and so he is in control.

I then ‘tail ended’ my day with Choral Evensong in the cathedral which is becoming a space where (now) familiar words but unfamiliar music are allowing me to experience new things of God.

4 months in – and it still makes me smile that God has placed this pioneer where he has placed him, and I’m still amazed at what God is revealing to me through the unfamiliarity of it all.

Epiphany Jouney’s

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Today was Epiphany and this evening in the cathedral we marked this with a Eucharist service rather than evensong.

The whole Epiphany thing, where we remember the visit of the Magi and the gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh, seems to me to be all about journeying.

While reflecting today, listening to Neil’s sermon this evening, and after reading Maggi’s final reflection in Beginnings and Endings, I was struck by the journey of the magi and how that journey connected with my thoughts here on the life changing disruption a baby causes.

The encounter with the Christ child for the magi was also disruptive. They traveled, following the star but had to return home by a different route. For them, as for others, the encounter with this child meant things could never be the same again. For them, it meant returning home via different route. For them it gave opportunity of fresh discovery.

That sense of returning home by a different route resonates with me at this point in time. A couple of people have asked me how I am feeling about ‘stuff’ over the last few days and I must admit that as well as starting to become frustrated with waiting I feel very much as if I know where I am going, or I roughly know where I think I should be, but that I need to find a new route to get there. I don’t necessarily think it’s a new fresh path – I don’t think the Magi would have made a fresh track, it would probably have been walked by others but it was new to them as they had never taken the route. I wonder whether there is a path, a route, an ancient track that needs rediscovering, uncovering and walking along again.

But it is not just about the destination is it! There is something about the actual journey itself. There is something about noticing what you are passing through, the ‘lie of the land’ and the context of what you are seeing.

One of my little frustrations is that our family car came with a free DVD player. It’s great for long journey’s when you ahve 3 children and when we travel to Dorset, Devon or Cornwall it comes in very handy for a peaceful journey. But … when we travel short distances, such as 20 minutes to Bluewater or 40 minutes to Canterbury the children have started to like to watch DVD’s for this short time. They plug in via their headphones to whatever film they choose. While they do this, the outside world that they are passing through whizzes by un-noticed.

I can’t help but think they are missing out on stuff that children of previous generations would have noticed. Things go by and my children travel through areas untouched by the outside world. They know the start and end of their journey well, but the middle part is missing.

I feel there is something in this ‘journey stuff’ for me to reflect upon. I am asking and wondering what it might be that God wishes me to notice on the way. I guess to notice things properly there is a need to journey slowly and register and take note of what God puts in the path of the traveler. To pioneer is to go slow and allow God to show me how to discover stuff afresh.

So … here’s to more of that frustrating waiting then!

Digging wells

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I am loving starting and ending my days during Advent by reading Maggi Dawn’s ‘Beginning and Endings’. As I thought it would, the whole concept of waiting has taken on a new meaning for me over this Advent and Maggi’s daily gems are a great and challenging addition to my day.

I have been made to think a lot, but was particularly challenged to think deeper on the 10th Dec reading which is still in the front of my head. The title for the day is ‘Redigging the wells’ and tells the story from Genesis 26 of Issac looking for land and water to sustain his flocks. I was challenged because as I have read those stories over and over I have got the image of these nomads moving around the desert in no fixed way, but ‘as the mood takes’.

Issac, however, re-visted and re-dug the wells that his father, Abraham had dug before him. from here I quote Maggi (p.49):

…One of the temptations of living in post Christian culture is to attempt to recreate church from scratch. In Issac’s story we have a picture of someone who goes back to the traditional sources and begins to dig for himself. He doesn’t rest on his father’s laurels, neither does he set out for new land. He finds the traditional sites and he digs. The result was he heard God’s promise for himself.

A I look ahead to what may be with a new community, I am fully aware that we have over 2000 years of tradition and practice to draw upon. My role as I understand it today is not to find and create new practices or just create newer and more unique ways of being church in order to create something new and accessible. My role, with these people, is to go back to the traditional sites and dig. As we dig we should look again at what we dig up and what we reveal. We should look afresh at what we uncover. We should take these ancient truths and chat about them. We should travel together with them and see what applying them in 21st century life is like and how it works. This is traveling together in a real sense.

It is so easy to get sucked in to new things, the endless need for creativity for creativity’s sake. The need to create new church to be seen as creating new church. All this stuff is good stuff with a BUT! But … if the creativity is not grounded in the ancient tradition we have then it will have little substance. Stuff with little substance, even church (!), will just not survive. It may look good, it may attract attention, but I am not interested in that; I want to be part of something with God integrity and sustainability.

Some of those wells have been covered for a while, and there is a lot of digging that probably needs to be done. When Issac dug he discovered something amazing – he discovered God’s promise first hand. He stopped standing on Abraham’s interpretation of the promise and moved on with God himself. He was able to see the truth in a new light, and in a way that meant something to him in his situation and his time. When we dig the ancient wells and look afresh like Issac then I think we are able to truly call scripture the living word of God.

As a community, when it forms, (and I believe one will) we will need to dig and be ready to discover that promise for ourselves. In a sense it would be a lot easier to just create and develop something we all like and are happy with. This will probably end up being something that satisfies our own frustrations with church rather than being rooted and bedded in God and Christian tradition. It is more likely to be something that meets our own needs rather than allows God to show us things beyond our wildest dreams.

I pray God will give us the ability to re dig the wells we need to re dig.

view through my glass

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A number of interesting things have been happening in the pub which I have been hanging out in in my dog collar. It’s amazing me more and more what God is seeming to start to do through a willingness to be in the same place wearing a dog collar.

One day this week I was plunged into a depth that took me outside my comfort zone. I was getting ready to leave. I saw a bloke I had not seen before heading for the exit when he saw me, turned around, knelt next to the sofa I was sitting in and started to weep as he shared stuff that he was guilty about. It was an uncomfortable, but sacred, moment.

I felt uncomfortable. I was conscious lots of people were watching this man but it was a privilege to sit there and listen. I did not offer stuff to fix the situation (I wanted to but was lost for words!) and this seemed to be the right thing for this guy. I simply listened and then went for a walk with him outside. I hope I meet him again sometime.

Other things are also happening – I have been asked to pray for people, a guy in his late 70’s has cancer in the pancreas and is having an operation at the weekend – his brother asked me to pray as there is a chance he will die on the operating table. Please join me in praying for this man and his brother.

I used to go in and wonder what I was achieving by being here – but now it seems that someone talks about something nearly every day – it is truly amazing! I have even been asked (jokingly!!!) by a woman if I would marry her and her boyfriend after she gets him drunk enough to say yes!!!

There is a mix of humour and seriousness which I think helps people to kind of break the ice. I think people want to talk, want to worship, are looking for answers but are not sure how to approach churches and people in churches because the church has a history of retreating from culture, particularly the places I hand out in.

The other week I reflected on people not wanting to enter the sanctuary becasue they felt they were not good enough, or that the place was too special to step into. Soem would have us believe that people cannot sense, and neither are they interested in, the spiritual anymore.

These experiences lead me to think this is not the case.

This may be all small stuff but it is encouraging stuff and stuff that seems to show that God is indeed working in his world – and that people are sensing that but not sure what to do about it. As ‘church’ I think we need to think more about how we can help people in that discovery.

mixed mission

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It has been another interesting week in the ‘life of a pioneer curate’.

This week has, again, been a mixture of what some may call ‘traditional’ curacy / vicar type work whilst other has not.

I have already spoken about Monday’s ‘traditional’ experience.

On Tuesday I had the pleasure of ‘leading’ the carol service for Rochester Grammar for Girls. It was a great event and the talent of these young ladies who so obviously loved singing and playing their instruments was great to see. It was a shame the press were not there – the press who so love to ‘bash’ teenagers through their pages, giving the impression that all are violent and have no respect, when actually we know that the overwhelming majority of young people just wish to love life and developing their gifts without hurting others. If present the press would have seen real young people. Anyway … I will climb off the hobby horse now!

This weekend I will attend the 10.30 Eucharist and I will be preaching at the 3.15 Choral Evensong looking at Philippians 4:4-7. Again this is all quite traditional stuff which I am still enjoying as is an important part of my role and training.

The pioneering work, which is still good old fashioned hard graft, is starting to show some little signs of progress after 14 weeks of going to the same places on nearly a daily basis and just being there. A lot of those 14 weeks have seen me sitting alone, sometimes mentally arguing with God over what I am doing, staring out the window, reading the odd chapter of various books and generally waiting to see what God may choose to do, or what God may not choose to do.

The last 2 weeks in particular some of the men have started to chat generally with me. That may not seem great, but these men are in these places every day and for some it has taken me being there every day for 12/13 weeks for them to even acknowledge me. The fact that we are having short conversations now is pretty amazing. I am learning names and they know mine.

There is one day when I talk to a particular couple and on another day I chat with 3 older gentlemen who have been drinking together on the same day at the same time for a couple of pints for years.

What is my role here is an interesting question. I think some are wondering if I am going to be like an evangelist and look for conversions in front of the bar. Others may think I’m just getting out of the cathedral because I like a pint! My role, as I believe it, it just simply to be there, with no agenda and no fixed dream of an outcome.

That may seem like I am aiming for nothing and so will hit nothing. There would be a danger of that if I were aiming for nothing. I have the aim of discovering what God is doing in these places and then looking how I can join in with that. My prayer goes something like this

If you, God, are simply loving people then I hope I have the patience to join you,
If you, God, are challenging then I hope I have the courage to step up to that,
If you, God, are crying with people then I hope I can be comfortable in that intimacy,
If you, God, are convicting then I hope I can be ready to encourage,
If you, God, are being persecuted then I hope I have the strength stand firm.
For you, God, are here and I just need eyes to see you.

For me it is interesting to recognise that it was around 12 weeks of daily presence before I was trusted to chat with. I am aware the collar does not always help and will be a ‘put off’ but all too often we look for quick remedies and quick fixes. As I am learning in a special way through this advent – anything really worth having has to be waited for – Mary waited 9 months for Jesus, and so far we’ve waited 2000 years. Nothing of any real value comes quickly.

BTW – if you are interested I produce a weekly email to those people that wish to know what I am up to so they can pray specifically – if you’d like to receive it drop me an email – the link is in the right hand bar of the blog.

God Space

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As a follow up from my last post the man I had agreed to meet did not show. There could be a number of reasons for this – I assumed he knew where the cathedral was, he may have got held up in work, he may have lost courage, God may have brought someone else into his life.

While I sat and waited in the cathedral for an hour I reflected on how I was feeling. In the past I would have felt frustration at the no-show, maybe even a small amount of anger. The frustration would have its heart in my desperation to see lives transformed and believing I had some key role in that. The anger would come from a badly arrogant view that I was important and this (usually young) person was simply wasting my time.

On Tuesday I felt neither and still feel neither. As I wait more and more I seem to be understanding just a little that God does the work, not me. Not only does God do the work, but God also controls the time. God caused this man to cross my path on Friday and ask for a time to chat, God will do that again and my role is simply to understand that it is about the other person and God and not really a lot to do with me.

It’s amazing but I feel a massive sense of privilege, even in the no-show. While waiting I was chatting with God, asking him for wisdom, asking to be prepared, asking for God to work through me in this conversation. I can’t put my finger on it, but an hour with God will have changed me in some way, so despite the fact this gentlemen never showed up, the conversation was still one of transformation.

I have no worries about meeting this man again, or of missed opportunity. God brought us together once for an encounter. We can never know what God does through such encounters, but we do know that if God chooses to bring us together again it will happen.

What I am focusing in on slowly is that it is really hard to let God. We sing of God being Lord, God being in control, God pulling things together, God causing things to happen … and yet sitting back and giving God the time to do that is really very very difficult. There is an unwritten pressure to have outcomes, to see results, to actually plan to do something.

I am very fortunate here in that the Dean and Chapter and the Diocese are giving me space to look, observe and try to discover what God is doing and then respond to that and join in with it. This takes time and space and I’m very conscious of how privileged I am.