Category Archives: faith

Sweeps Festival

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The bank holiday weekend has seen The Sweeps Festival in Rochester. My role throughout this has been to be a ‘presence’ in and around the cathedral. It’s been an interesting role – not particularly pioneering, but there have been some interesting questions and discussions with people visiting. I have prayed with a few people, answered faith type questions, and advised a young man getting married that feeling nervous is quite normal. A lot of the time, though, has been spent smiling and greeting people as they come into the cathedral.

On a couple of occasions I have managed to get outside the cathedral and taste the real flavour of the festival. While the cathedral is a place of calm the streets are overflowing with people enjoying the folk music and the morris dancing while enjoying a pint or two of real ale. The festival has a great atmosphere with people looking to have a good time while enjoying and remembering some traditional English arts. On a few occasions I have been able to enjoy the music and the beer.

As I wondered around on the Saturday I had one negative, but interesting, comment from a woman who walked past me as I was standing outside the cathedral. ‘Ugghhh morris dancers and priests! They don’t go together!’ In a sense she is right, but I wonder (1) why she thought that and (2) is it actually the case.

The tradition of morris dancing is popularly thought to have its root in paganism, and I guess the comment came from the woman because of this. As a Christian, however, who believes this world is God’s creation and that there is nowhere where God is not present, then I have to say I disagree with the comment. Morris dancing and priests do go together (and yes I know I am a deacon, but it was not appropriate to point out the difference to this lady). Actually I have looked into this pre-christian pagan thing and apparently there is no evidence to suggest that is the root of morris dancing. I have also met over the last few days quite a few people involved in church who are also heavily involved in morris dancing.

As I wandered and chatted with some people there seemed to be quite a large open-ness. Large numbers of people seemed to be interested in ‘things spiritual’. I wonder if the interest in Folk and the interest in Morris Dancing feeds a spiritual appetite in people. While the interest many had with things spiritual, it would not be seen as mainstream Christianity. People spoke more of ‘mother earth’ and a ‘deep energy’. I had a sense of people worshiping creation rather than the creator.

I think this may be the case and I am wondering whether a better way to engage with people at this festival is more along the lines of what we offer at the MBS fair I spoke of a little while ago. Certainly many people were interested in spirituality and an opportunity to explore some of these in a relaxed way as we do at MBS may well work here. I wonder whether through things like the Jesus Deck, prayer beads and dream interpretation may the kind of thing that these folk and morris lovers that people here might be able to experience some of the wonder of the creator God.

These are all just early thoughts off the back of the festival but I’m just wondering – does anyone else out there have experience of MBS type stuff being done at musical / folk festivals? If so, I’d be really interested in talking to you.

the dialogue adventure

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Recently I blogged about someone else’s take on community and the churches role within it. I stated I have difficulty with a view that sees the community as a place where we are called to build relationships simply to see converts to Christianity. That’s what I want to see happen, that’s what I pray will happen, but I build relationships because I am interested in people and genuinely want to get to know others. It’s up to God to do anything else and if he leads things that way I am more than happy to respond. My motivation, though, is centred in being and bringing good news, and by that I think I mean bringing a taste of the Kingdom of God.

Although I disagree with the other way of doing things, I do see a place for it and would have welcomed the chance for dialogue; and by dialogue I do not mean debate. Too often the former has been stated when the latter has been meant … as the only point of the ‘dialogue’ has been to try and convert the other to your own way of thinking. In debate you try to change the opinion, in dialogue you come searching for truth and are open to the possibility that you have more to learn on this issue … or (shock horror!) that I may even be wrong!!!

For some reason dialogue has not been possible in this situation. My comments have been ignored and left unpublished – and I realise I am treading on dangerous ground here as I could be accused of griping over being ignored … I hope I am not. It does concern me, however, that this is an issue with part of the church – the refusal to enter into dialogue with some others who are seen as having a different brand of truth to themselves.

I am saddened that we see this over and over again. Christians refusing to dialogue with people they disagree with only harms us all in that we stay incomplete in our understanding of each other and of God. Through this experience I feel personally saddened at the lost opportunity to learn from my Christian brother of differing views. I think the experience could have informed and enriched both our relationships with God.

The Asbo Jesus cartoon has reminded me of one of the things that I have learned from my three years at SEITE which I hope will stay with me – most often I learned a lot more from those of a differing tradition and viewpoint than my own. It was in those discussions with people seeing things from the opposite end of the spectrum to me that I felt drawn closer to a better understanding of God.

Some people may think they are protecting the faith my staying ‘pure’ and not sharing or talking with others that have a different view on ‘truth’ but essentially I think we all lose out personally, but more importantly the whole body of Christ loses out on a great opportunity to learn, grow and develop. I do wonder if it results in us all worshipping a much poorer image of God as our understanding can only be enlarged if we embrace those of other Christian traditions around us – if we could achieve more of that then THAT would be good news and a bit of an adventure!

I deny the resurrection!

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Great post here from Pete Rollins – go beyond the shock of the title and read the post to be challenged.

reality or memento?

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Mark pointed to this picture recently from Matt Rees
It’s an amazing picture and both Mark and Matt share thoughts on mementos and technology getting in the way of the experience.

Why do people feel that they want a memento of an occasion like this. Why is it that we are unable to be enveloped within and enjoy the experience itself? I know, however, if I was in that room I would be doing the same – taking my crappy little picture on my phone to put on my blog … but why?

Is it something to do with wanting to feel important – taking the photo shows others that you were there. Is it to show others … children and grandchildren in times to come? Could it be to serve as a reminder, in the full knowledge that the memory of the event will fade unless we something to remind us?

Since September I have been keeping a journal to write thoughts that I wish to keep private rather than broadcast on SHP. It strikes me today that this is a kind of memento where I ‘enjoy the experience’ while also making a written record of it.

I have only been keeping this journal for 4 months but reading through my early reflections already sounds weird. Some of the stuff I can’t believe I wrote only 2 months ago. It’s been good to read as when I have been looking at my memento I have been reminded of conversations, of ideas and as I dwell on them I remember more and different things about the day in question.

So even though at first sight this picture may look a little sad – the taking of these pictures will not only serve as a memento to a great day but will also serve as a reminder for other thoughts, conversations and happenings of the day itself. Without that memento I forget those things that bring both tears and smiles to my face.

on the road

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This morning was the most daunting task that I have had to carry out since being ordained and being at the cathedral. We have recently started a Family Eucharist, which is an all age service in the cathedral. Today I spoke at the Family Eucharist and I think I was the most nervous I have been for quite a while.

For the last however many years I have avoided the talk/sermon at family services of any kind. Even when I was on the staff of Holy Trinity Nailsea I avoided this as Sarah is so much better – and still is.

My curacy at the cathedral meant that today was the day to break new ground. My first ever family service talk. I started the talk by playing a few games such as ‘I Spy’, ‘Numberplates’ and ‘Animal Alphabet’ and I was quite excited to hear people calling out names of animals as we went through the alphabet. We got stuck on the letter x but there seems to be quite a few here – none of which I have ever heard – such as the xenopus pictured!

My aim through these was to introduce the idea of journey as these games are typical of those played in cars with children on journeys – and today we were looking at Saul’s journey to Damascus and meeting Jesus on the road.

The interesting thing for me in the preparation for this talk is where Jesus chooses to meet with Saul. It is on the road where the action is – not at the destination, not during a camp set up for the night, not even during a lunch break … but God chooses to meet with Saul while Saul is on a normal everyday journey as part of his normal everyday work.

As I dwelled on that, I then started to wonder whether I have actually ever missed God on my everyday travels through being plugged into my ipod, reading my book (not whilst driving!) or just because I have been too intent on the task being finished or the destination being reached. It’s an interesting thought.

Could it be that God is trying to break through a lot of the time, maybe not as majorly and unavoidably as he does with Saul in today’s text – but still in an unmistakingly unique way that tells us it is God? I wonder …

(if you want to read the whole talk (all one and a bit sides of A4!) it will be on the cathedral website with all the other sermons here.

15 years of love

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It’s weird today to be celebrating Tom being 15.

It does sound like a cliche, but I do vividly remember every detail of that day 15 years ago; the very ability to recall even minor facts from 15 years ago surprises me as I have difficulty remembering some stuff of the last week, or more recent years.

I can remember it was a Sunday and waking at around 730 to hear Sarah wandering around downstairs. WE went to the hospital at 8am. Tom was born at about 615pm. This morning he apologised for keeping us waiting so long – it was a long time and it is the only time that I have read the whole of the Sunday Times cover to cover while Sarah dozed or whatever.

I remember the room we waited in, the delivery suite, the colour of the walls, the enquiring phonecalls from excited young people from our youth group, the excitement on the telephone of new grand mothers, the first conversation I had with new born Tom as I held him in my arms as Sarah was taken off to have a bath, the leaving the hospital alone in the evening to join Annie and Phil for a celebratory beer (no change there then)and the journey back the next day.

I’m not a very good dad. Like other dads I look back and think I could have done more, have guilt about missed opportunities, wish I had done this or that instead of that and this … but this day each year, as do the births of my other two children, cause me to reflect on God.

I remember all those details as if they were yesterday because I, as a poor dad, allowed that day, that birth, to have a massive impact on me. It changed my life because here was a child I had had a part in creating and loved in a way that I could not describe. I guess I can only call it a father love, and maybe only fathers can understand what that is, in the same way that only mothers can relate to other mothers feelings – I don’t know, I’m falling into an emotional ramblement!

As a poor father these thin gs have had a massive impact and caused a great love to develop within me for Tom … it just gives me a tiny sense of the great love that father God has for all of his children. To think about it blows the mind, to try and explain it is ridiculously silly – the need to accept the mystery of it is just as ridiculously necessary.

Anyway – Happy Birthday Tom … 15 today, have a great day … I know you will!

Twilight love

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Last night I went to the cinema to watch Twilight. It’s a modern day love story with some interesting twists and a fair number of adrenalin action scenes.

It’s a story of two worlds meeting, of taboos being broken and personal safety being thrown aside for love of another person. There are two central characters, Bella who is an independent teenage girl and Edward who happens to be a vampire.

There are some great gritty themes of love coming out of the film (as opposed to slushy cheap love that is often displayed in movies) which show that real love costs, demands a risk for all (not just the two who are ‘in love’) and that loves can only result in some difficult choices.

When Edward is talking with Bella, suggesting she should stay away because he is ‘the most dangerous predator in the world’ she replies ‘I’d rather die than stay away from you.’The film starts with Bella saying something like ‘I never thought of ding, but if you have to die, what better way than to die in the place of someone you love.’

My reflections and thoughts immediately went to the cross and again, I am forced to recognise the presence of God and God themes through many movies that are around at the moment. I am freminded again that the sacred secular divide is a human construct, and that God is able, willing and does step across, blur and dismiss such divides.

The reminder to me is to look through those barriers and allow myself to see them blurred so that I do not place my personal limits on how, when and where God can speak.

rejected

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Recently I had a conversation with a young lady that saddened me intensely.

A little while into the conversation the young lady, of about 19/20, said ‘of course I used to go to church but I left …. I had to leave because no one will accept me … I would be religious if I could find a church that would accept me but none will … because I am gay.’

The conversation went on and she seemed positively surprised to hear that not everyone in the church felt she was condemned because of her sexuality. She was surprised to hear that not all in the church would condemn her because she is attracted to other women.

I left the conversation with a deep sadness for this young lady. I wanted to prove to her that God loves her, that she is not condemned in any way and that God views her as his daughter and loves her intensely no matter what she does, who she is, or who she sleeps with.

I wanted to apologise for the church. Even as I write I can feel tears welling – for here is a daughter of Christ who wants to be accepted, who wants to worship and be part of a Christian community – and yet she is deprived of that because of the foolishness of ideas and rules that have lost or forgotten the major point of our faith in Christ – God is love and Jesus came to bring all people back into relationship with God – irrespective of social standing, colour of skin, sexuality, gender, geography, …. the list can go on.

If I can cry over a young girl like this deprived of her Lord by people – I am forced to ask what is God’s reaction? The God who knit this girl together in her mother’s womb, the God who breathed life giving spirit into her lungs, the God who has ordained her days, the God who knows her better than she knows herself and the God who loves her totally and unconditionally. I have shed a few tears … does God cry a river, a lake, an ocean?

A deep sense of sadness and helplessness sum up this whole conversation for me. All I can do is pray:

Lord, meet this young lady where she is, reassure her of her love for you and in some way draw her back to yourself with people who understand and accept. Amen

Happy New Year

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Personally 2008 was something of an exciting year with ordination, the Olympics and seeing friends and children take on new challenges successfully.

I blog to record and review, to contemplate and consider. After four and a half years blogging I still love seeing a comment from someone. This past year there have been a couple of interactions with people – it’s great to be able to tussle over subjects together, and to learn from each other and be supported by each other in this way.

One way I like to reflect is to look back over past blogs from previous years and on Jan 1st 2008 I wrote:

But this is now 2008!
Tomorrow I am back at work with millions of others.
I could look back on the year, but I want to look ahead.

2008 … the year of Hope.
I hope the church rise to the challenge to bring hope this year rather than complain.
For us 2008 will be a year of change in so many ways.
I have dreams for 2008.
Some big, some little.
Some totally in my control, others not.
All important.
2008 will also be a year of painful anniversaries for family and friends alike.
It’s not all going to be rosy!

I’m making no resolutions this year, just a commitment to myself to be realistic and keep my promises which probably means I will have to say ‘no’ every now and again!

Whatever happens, 2008 is going to be a year of opportunity.
We can look back and regret, or we can look forward and grasp the opportunities that arise.
Here’s to looking forward.

In many ways, stuff has not changed from that – I still have the same hopes and dreams. (and I am actually very pleased to be able to note that I have said ‘no’ to a few things this year which has allowed space for other things). The fact that those dreams have not been realised yet does not mean they were wrong, it just means I have to continue to wait while acknowledging that God works at a different speed to me. God sees the bigger picture while I get frustrated in my immediacy.

Of course, the unrealised dreams could also be due to me having heard God wrong – but in many ways the easy thing to do is to decide I have heard wrong and change what I do, rather than continue in the uncomfortableness of ministry that I currently experience. In our culture of instants, it can be difficult to stick at waiting because it is so alien to us.

As with last year, whatever happens, 2009 is going to be a year of opportunity. For one I am seriously hoping a new president of the USA will see a change in a policy of allowing atrocities against those living in Gaza – will this be an opportunity taken or lost?

I guess the challenge is to notice the opportunities that God gives and discern the places and ways that God is working before our eyes – as John the Baptist says: ‘Among you stands one whom you do not know, the one who is coming after me; I am not worthy to untie the thong of his sandal.’ (John 1: 26-27)

Happy New Year to you all – and in 2009 may you be blessed in you meeting of and with the ‘one who stands among us’

not lost – just tired in space

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I am aware that I have been quiet here for the last few days. There are two main reasons for this; one being there has not been a massive amount for me to write about, and the other that I have been incredibly, and unusually, tired.

I am finding that the actual practice of being and waiting can be quite tiring.

It seems an odd thing to say. It is certainly an odd thing to experience. A few months ago I was enjoying a role with YFC which could see me leave early in the morning, drive to the other side of the country, speak at a couple of meetings, pop in on another team and arrive home late to repeat the process again the next day, maybe with the difference of using the train rather than the car. While that was tiring, the tiredness I am currently feeling is very different.

This tiredness seems to be a deeper tiredness, and I can’t really explain what I mean by that.

I do know that I am not really physically exerting myself, neither am I putting my brain under great pressure in moving from one activity to another. I am simply sitting and waiting to see what will happen today. Someone asked if I was going out to chat with people and my response was ‘no’, actually I am not. I am going out and waiting to see what God will do in the places I visit. I am asking why this process of waiting is so tiring.

I think it is so tiring because the waiting space is allowing space for ideas to grow and develop.

One thing I am noticing as I wait is that I am starting to consider things more deeply in an imaginative and creative way. When I was a child I did do a fair bit of dreaming when I should have been learning. In my waiting it seems that I an again finding this ability to daydream and imagine what could be. I guess this links to the prophet role I blogged about here a little while ago. In the past I have enjoyed tinkering with this, but time has always been a factor and I know I have had to draw the dreaming to a stop to enable something, a project or a retreat session, to be completed.

It seems now I have the space to think and go deeper.

On my desk I have a three postcards, and one that jumps out at me as I write today and it says Big Ideas need Big Spaces. It was a card I picked up in a pub in London advertising the Deisel Wall 2008 competition. The postcard has been there for a few months and now I am starting to understand the idea the statement is getting at.

The world we live in places extreme demands on us. It’s ironic, in a sense, to realise that the machines we have that were planned to make life easier for us have inadvertantly had the opposite effect. Instead of making life easier, they have in fact increased the expectation we place on ourselves and upon others to respond and perform. This has resulted in us working longer with boundaries of home and work melting into the shape of a laptop and so space to dream and create to diminish.

Seven or eight weeks on of waiting and having space to observe, to pray, to be available and I am finding that only now is my mind just starting to find the ‘big space’ that it needs to be able to start to imagine what is possible. I don’t know where this leading – but I do know it feels pretty weird – but then having space in a packed world is bound to be odd!