It was strange being back in Rochester today and I can’t put my finger on why.

Morning Prayer this morning was just the two of us. That in itself was a unique experience as in my time here there has always been at least 4. Saying canticles and psalms antiphonally together when there are only 2 voices (which means one voice at a time for those unfamiliar with Anglican worship) is quite amazing and seems almost to be a more intimate time with God. I thought it would be awkward but was amazed by how powerful the experience actually was. Often we can feel numbers make a massive difference … but when coming to God in prayer that just is not the case.

I prayed before going out on the High Street and to W/Spoons again this morning. I was particularly nervous today. I don’t know why, but there was a massive part of me that just did not want to leave the cathedral library and sit in the pub and ‘wait’. I prayed for guidance, I prayed for courage, I prayed that I would find someone who would want to talk.

Today I had nods of acknowledgment and later on, after I had eaten a great breakfast, got into conversation with 3 wonderful older gents in their 70’s who were all local and had served in the Royal Engineers. It was great to have a normal conversation about football, Medway and other stuff.

The interesting thing is that once I am out, once I step over thresholds of coffee shops or pubs I am not nervous and feel very comfortable. Certainly I feel comfortable in the places I am inhabiting and it seems to be just ‘right’ to quietly sit and just be myself. I don’t ever feel out of place and don’t pick up that others feel I am out of place either, although I am often greeted with looks of surprise and confusion. Sometimes conversations happen, sometimes they don’t. Conversations seem to be becoming more frequent. Actually, saying that, the last 4 times I have been in I have ended up chatting with people – and I’ve only just realised that through this process of reflection!

So … it’s good to reflect!