A typical Monday today – I’ve been trying to write up stuff, waiting for stuff to come in so that I can pass it on to waiting people, fielding phonecalls and then I came to the sermon I am preaching on Sunday night.

Revelation 3:1-6. I will be preaching for the first time at this church, the church leaders are on holiday and I must admit to thinking that maybe they want me to challenge the church here. There is a mass of stuff in these 6 verses that would seriously challenge any church. The text is regarding the church in Sardis and how, on the outside, they look good, but actually on the inside they are dead and rotten.

I’m not quite sure how I will get stuff across just yet(well I have some ideas but they would all result in upstanding church members leaving the church … so I need inspiration!), but it is impossible to read such a passage and not just sit still and ask yourself the obvious question. Everything looks good on the outside but, in truth, am I just dead inside? Am I just going through the motions? Am I working for working sake? What is my real motivation; is it to serve God, or just to get good deeds and a mount of work done?

Recently I have been involved in a lot of really good work: the East End, new centres, supporting staff, and all these things are good. But if I ask myself what the motivation has been behind, I am not sure whether it has been to please God or to prove myself to my line managers – which would be bizarre as I know I have their trust already.

Amongst all the busyness, time with God has suffered and other things have developed. Other things I struggle with have emerged and it seems I have forgotten v3:

Go back to what you heard and believed at first; hold to it firmly and turn to me again.

My Greek studies (I can hear the impressed intake of breath … Actually my trusty Vines Expository Dictionary bought for me years ago by Chris and Gary) informs me that the word ‘what’ there is incorrectly translated and should be how. In which case it would read:

Go back to how you heard and believed at first; hold to it firmly and turn to me again.

that makes what was already challenging even more so. I am being reminded here not only of what I believe, but how I first believed it. The how was through the power of the Holy Spirit – my faith was not just picked up in discussion, or through books, or because it suddenly all clicked. I am reminded today that my faith started, and had continued to develop, due to a life changing encounter with the Holy Spirit.

Remembering in what I believe is a challenge that keeps me going. Remembering how I believe is the motivation to wake me up so that I do not experience Jesus the thief as outlined later in that verse.