As you can see I am back from my three days in Ely. It was an interesting and tiring time, and I will reflect on my experiences there sometime in the not too distant future.

it’s weird to note that although I have only been away for 3 days that I feel weirdly out of touch. My time away was quite intense and my brain feels a bit mashed, but I sense that things have happened that I am not aware of at home and in my lovely communities of Gillingham and YFC. This has, I think, resulted in losing touch a little bit. Not too much – but enough to be noticeable to me.

Which brings me on to time. I have become conscious over these past few days how easily and rashly I throw time away. My money, which I can always get more of, I am careful with. My laptop/PDA/CD’s etc which can be replaced I am careful with. Food, of which there is plenty, I am careful with. Time, which is irreplaceable, I et slip through my fingers like sand, never able to pick it up again.

Why is that? Why do I waste time? Why do I allow time to slip through fingers? Why do I jealously guard the replaceable but have a carefree attitude with the irreplaceable.

I thought on this in the car and the only reason I can think is familiarity. Time is always there and so I forget it’s value. Money runs out at the end of the month, Food goes off if left too long and cd’s get broken. Time, though, always seems to be there and ticks along un-noticed, making no demands and drawing no attention.

God can be like time. Sitting, waiting, making no demands, drawing no attention. I think on this and scary question appears in my mind. ‘Have I become so familiar, in one sense with God, that I am letting him slip through my fingers un-noticed. Have I become so used to the presence of God around me that I am paying just lip service and missing the beauty and unique experiences of being with him.

Sadly I think I need to say yes to this. If God is always here, if God is always reaching down to meet with me, if he is always there waiting to interact – then I have to say a lot of the time I don’t notice him.

I have woken up to that in the last couple of days. I have seen and met God in others that I have spent time with people: Father John who has been in the same inner city parish for 34 years, Jamie who works with over 300 students in his church, Becca writing her PhD, Peter a policeman in Bristol, Mick my builder, and plenty of others.

Why do I only see God when I remember to look? Why do I forget to look so often and miss him so many times? Why?