I have spent time today in conversation with 2 vicars; one being Andy, my personal tutor, the other Bob my consultant/mentor for the next 3 years.

2 very different men, 2 men I very different ministries, but 2 men quite new to this ‘ordained lark’ with both having served their curacy in 3/4 years and one now a parish vicar and the other a SEITE tutor.

We chatted about the course and how I thought things were going, we shared frustrations and I shared where I thought my life was going and what I felt called to do.

Today has been a helpful day. A day when I realise I worry about stuff that I do not yet need a full answer to, although I would like a little more clarity so that I have some idea of where I am going. I want to know what God will have me doing in 1, 2 and 3 years time. I want to know but I don’t actually need to know.

It’s fascinating how people seem to strive for knowing what next. I have had a few conversations recently with good friends who have used similar terminology. They are in decision time and want to know what next, which road to take, which job to pursue, whether to change course. Before they feel they can do that, they need to know ‘what next’.

I’m asking if this is an impatient need to satisfy our emotions and feelings of security, or is it something deeper. Is it indicative of a person wanting to know they are in the right place and doing the right thing? It is the cry of someone craving acceptance? That’s a hard issue to contemplate when it is you asking the ‘what next’ question.

Earlier today I read Luke 3 : 22: ‘a voice from heaven said ‘You are my beloved son and I am fully pleased with you.”

The words of God to Jesus after his baptism telling him that God is ‘well pleased’ with him. As I dwelled on those words, it hit me! Rather a question hit me.

What was God fully pleased with?

Jesus had not yet done anything!
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has been living in the dirt and grime of Nazareth.
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has been working as a carpenter.
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has been a son to Mary.
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has not yet preached a sermon.
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has not yet healed any sick person.
Yet God is fully pleased.
Jesus has performed no miracles.
Yet God is fully pleased.

Jesus has just been in the place where God wanted him to be.
That’s why God is very pleased.

If I could grab the reality of that pleasure, of that acceptance from my heavenly father which comes from being who I am rather than what I do I think my life would be a lot simpler!